Asprin for kids in school?

Have you ever gotten a headache? I’m sure you have. What do you do when you get a headache? Go take an aspirin. What can’t you have in school? Aspirin. Do you get headaches in school? Yes. But you can’t have aspirin in school. How does that work? Simply put: It doesn’t.

Its lunchtime, and the drummers decide to go on a march. They walk by not once, but twice. Each time followed by a militia of screaming little kids, armed with shrilling voices sharp enough to cut diamonds. The diamond-cutting voices combined with the ruthless pounding of the drums makes for a high quality headache. Now, instead of studying for your test next block, you were distracted. You go to next block and perform poorly on your test, because you weren’t able to concentrate. Your parents find out, and you get grounded. This test also pulls your grade down from a B to a C right before the period ends. You get your report cad, and your parents see it, and you get grounded… again. All of this could have been avoided if you could have just taken a fast action Bayer.

We should be allowed to carry aspirin on the school campus. What could possibly go wrong? Why can’t we have them now? Some people would say this is because you can “overdose” on aspirin. I don’t know if that is true, but if it is… you can “overdose” anywhere, not just at school, and the only place you can’t carry aspirin is at school. Other people would say that you could just wait ‘til you get home to take an Advil. That wouldn’t be in time for my big test in third block.

According to the CNN health library, Eighty-five percent of people get headaches. Are students not people too? Another source says that four main things cause headaches. Anxiety, Glare, Noise, Anger. All four of those things thrive on a highschool campus.

After third the test in third block, you head on to fourth. The teacher gives a lecture. You can’t pay attention, because you’re too busy trying to ignore the pain of your headache. Finally its 2:52 and you get to leave, but not before writing down your homework. The next day, in fourth block, the teacher decides to give a pop quiz on the material covered the day earlier. You know nothing of it. Another horrible test. Grades even lower.

If aspirin was allowed in school not only would grades go up, but the amount of attention given to teachers would as well. This would push the FCAT scores up, earning more funding for the school. The school could then spend the money on more supplies for the classroom, or more teachers. This would bump the FCAT scores up even higher. Earning even more money for the school.

Higher FCAT scores will also help you get into a good college. Just another “ripple” effect from the aspirin.

Be it from horrible marching drummers, screaming little kids, bright light in your eyes, worrying over your test next block, studying as fast as you can, or from an annoying assembly in the theater, everyone gets headaches. It’s a fact. Everyone should be able to get relief from the pain, no matter where they are.

Better grades, better test scores, getting into better colleges, staying out of trouble at home, suicide prevention, more money for the school, and higher ranking of the school. All reasons as to why we should have aspirin on campus.